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Some clouds, 23C (25C)
T - 14 days
OhMyGosh, I'm so tired. Usually, at the end of the week, as I lock up the school, I get a second wind. Not this week. I just feel worn down, chewed up and spit out. I feel like I've grown very weak and lazy. I need, need, need to be very productive tomorrow. I'll let myself rest tonight, but I need to get shit done tomorrow.
I still have no address. I don't even know what city I'll be living in. I'm two weeks out and nothing is decided. I don't have my address. I don't have my new contract. I don't trust the company. I'm in a bad situation and I can't get myself out.
I feel more and more strongly that this MA in TESOL is something I really need to do if I want to win myself some footing to stand on, to maybe build on. God help me, the road there, though, is so full of potholes and I've already tripped into one... Getting out depends on my new contract. Money, it's always money. Am I really living so far beyond my means? I find it difficult to fathom, but maybe I am... insert other angsty whining about money/-flow issues.
I was able to go to synagogue, again this week, but the new rabbi and his family got stuck in the US for some ridiculous visa bullshit--apparently foreigners now need American visas to change flights on US soil. What a joke.
But this week I gained what could be an insight to my character, or rather, an aspect of my character that needs correcting--which is a boon for me, because while I know I'm really far from anything resembling right or perfect it's very difficult to identify specific things to target and work on. But this week, my coworker asked me to do something that I usually do anyway, and couched it in a phrase such as, "if you have free time..." I did it, but I felt a strong urge to talk back and I felt offended and interfered with. Then I realized that there are kindof a lot of those sorts of reactions. I really feel like I own my time and I am displeased when someone else implies or suggests that some of it might not be. So I'm trying to determine what is the source. What is the character flaw that it springs from? Is it arrogance? Selfishness? Immaturity? Not caring enough for others? I'm still not entirely sure what it is, but I'm working on it.
T - 14 days
OhMyGosh, I'm so tired. Usually, at the end of the week, as I lock up the school, I get a second wind. Not this week. I just feel worn down, chewed up and spit out. I feel like I've grown very weak and lazy. I need, need, need to be very productive tomorrow. I'll let myself rest tonight, but I need to get shit done tomorrow.
I still have no address. I don't even know what city I'll be living in. I'm two weeks out and nothing is decided. I don't have my address. I don't have my new contract. I don't trust the company. I'm in a bad situation and I can't get myself out.
I feel more and more strongly that this MA in TESOL is something I really need to do if I want to win myself some footing to stand on, to maybe build on. God help me, the road there, though, is so full of potholes and I've already tripped into one... Getting out depends on my new contract. Money, it's always money. Am I really living so far beyond my means? I find it difficult to fathom, but maybe I am... insert other angsty whining about money/-flow issues.
I was able to go to synagogue, again this week, but the new rabbi and his family got stuck in the US for some ridiculous visa bullshit--apparently foreigners now need American visas to change flights on US soil. What a joke.
But this week I gained what could be an insight to my character, or rather, an aspect of my character that needs correcting--which is a boon for me, because while I know I'm really far from anything resembling right or perfect it's very difficult to identify specific things to target and work on. But this week, my coworker asked me to do something that I usually do anyway, and couched it in a phrase such as, "if you have free time..." I did it, but I felt a strong urge to talk back and I felt offended and interfered with. Then I realized that there are kindof a lot of those sorts of reactions. I really feel like I own my time and I am displeased when someone else implies or suggests that some of it might not be. So I'm trying to determine what is the source. What is the character flaw that it springs from? Is it arrogance? Selfishness? Immaturity? Not caring enough for others? I'm still not entirely sure what it is, but I'm working on it.
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