(no subject)

I am so miserable, and frustrated, and angry. Nothing is working and I can't do anything. I can't even take it, much less calmly. What could be so wrong with me that I can't make this work--somehow? Why is nothing working out the way I want it to? I blame so many things other than myself for my current situation, but how much of it is really justified? And what does it even matter who's fault it is when I have to fix it by myself, anyway? But I can't fix it, even though I'm doing everything I'm supposed to. So why won't it work for me when it works for everyone else? That makes me really unreasonably upset.

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(no subject)

I feel a little more able to take things after some sleep. If my manager isn't getting sick, today, I'll ask for help. Maybe then at least having the Internet at home will work out...

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(no subject)

Shit, shit, shit...

I feel so restless, and this life really isn't helping assuage this drive to flight. Maybe it's better for my never-arriving future that they're nowhere to be found, but, damnit, where are my horse and mountain range?

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